Business bloopers - we've all made a few. Like my friend Collin, who spilled soup on his perspective boss's lap, or Janet who e-mailed a personal note to a business contact by mistake. Bloopers are good for a laugh when they happen to someone else. They can also help us avoid mistakes.

July Contest Winner

Every once in a while I need a reminder to pay attention to details. This one was unforgettable. For some unknown reason I had concluded that a colleague of mine was single. So when I encountered him unexpectedly at a local festival, and saw him seated next to a female, I greeted him with a cheery "Oh, you brought your Mom along!"

I shall never forget the painful look on his wife's face as she turned to meet me, or his look of complete embarrassment as he introduced her. Years later, I have still not found an acceptable exit line for such a unintentionally insensitive comment. It was, however, a powerful business lesson - a strong reminder to pay close attention to people and details of circumstances before putting mouth in gear, to see a client for who they truly ARE, not for who I have presumed them to be. Sylvia Hartmann,  Ontario Canada

June Contest Winner 1

I emailed my girlfriend and told her what a nice shirt I had just won in a contest. The only catch was, I had addressed it to the company having the contest and I had left the "r" out of shirt. Well, the person from the company, wrote me and they all had a good laugh...said it wasn't often that their shirts were spelled like that! Lou Harris, Middleburg, Florida

June Contest Winner 2

Early in my career, I was employed with an engineering firm and much to my grief, my boss passed away. His widow decided to sell the business to an out-of-town firm hoping to expand their business interests. Because of my extensive knowledge, they asked me to stay with the firm. I was so enthused and excited yet a bit apprehensive and nervous about meeting my new employer and endeavored to make a wonderful impression. My first day at work, I wore my best dress, pasted an enthusiastic smile on my face, and walked in the door with my hand outstretched to shake his in acknowledgement. He invited me into his private office and in gentlemanly fashion, allowed me to walk in front of him. I noticed he made a funny sound and said, "First things first...I hope you don't mind." He then proceeded to zip the back of my dress up, which I unknowingly had forgotten in my haste. Needless to say, I spent the rest of the day with a very red face!  Edith Cason, Charlotte NC

May Contest Winner 1

On my first day at a new job as an associate attorney in a law firm, a dozen or so of the lawyers, including my new boss, took me to lunch. We walked to a nearby restaurant and sat around a big table to talk.

One of my new colleagues made several snide remarks at my expense and I ignored him. But when he asked me what I drive and started carrying on about his sports car, I'd had enough. He was a pencil-neck geek of a guy, and I was a fitness buff in the best shape of my life. So I said, "Well, Bob, I'd rather have a high-performance body than a high performance car." The table went dead silent for several seconds before everyone recovered. I was a bit taken aback, thinking that it was a pretty good rejoinder, but it wasn't THAT good.

After lunch, we all walked back to the office. I noticed for the first time that Rob had a club foot and walked with a pronounced limp. Mike Vaio, Raleigh  NC

May Contest Winner 2

One evening after work my colleagues and I, over cocktails, were discussing the latest rumor circulating our department about the so-called marital problems our vice-president was experiencing with his not-so-faithful wife. The next morning I had an interview for a rival department that was top secret. As I entered the elevator in our head office I saw my vice-president rushing towards me. Nervous, I began to rack my brain for how I could explain my being here and not in our office. When he entered the elevator I quickly blurted out, "Oh, don't worry sir. I am only here to see your wife!" Needless to say, I got the job, and I left as graciously as I could! Patriack  Nasser, LaSalle,  Quebec

April Contest Winner

My business partner, Jane Fridrich and I were approaching Niagara College to deliver a course. As we approached, Jane turned to me and said, "Is it raining?" Nope. Much to her horror, a trail of seagulls were flying overhead. She reached up and, sure enough, she had been dropped on, right in the middle of her head! Collapsing into fits of laughter, we rushed into the nearest washroom, stuck her head under the closest tap and used the hand air dryer to dry her hair as best we could. The blooper? Never park in the fall near a grape vineyard. The birds love the grapes and it colors everything they do! 

A business tip? Always build in some time to allow for the unexpected when attending a business meeting. Our lesson? Wear a dark suit -- it forgives many things. Joan Grobb Augustino, Fonthill Ontario

March Contest Winner

January Contest Winner

I was invited to give a short presentation to a new Toastmaster's chapter. Just before leaving the house, I looked down at my shoes and realized they were all scuffed up. Quickly, I brushed some shoe polish on them and shined them to perfection. Ten minutes into my talk, I turned right to make a point, and went flying in front of the chairperson. Embarrassed and knowing the show must go on, I said "you did not think you would get this type of entertainment"! Lesson learned: try not to get polish on your heels, plan ahead, and if you are a women, wear lower heels. P.S. The next day, I was bombarded by e-mails and rave reviews. It takes a trooper to laugh off a blooper! Adele Alfano, Ontario

More January Bloopers:

I remember my first sales visit as a rep for the phone company back in the early 80's. I was fresh off of three months sales training but I was nervous for my first call which was scheduled bright and earlier at 7:30 in the morning across town. Everything was going quite well with the prospect until I glanced down and discovered that I had two different shoes on: one with a tassel and the other without. I know this has happened to others. But at second glance, I discovered that not only did I have two different shoes on, I also had two different colours...neither of which matched my suit. I couldn't help it. I began to lose concentration and began to giggle. As the customer looked at me I finally explained what happened. He laughed heartily and then...called in HIS sales staff to share in the ...ah...humur. The long and the short of it, though, was: I did get the sale. Jim Domanski, Ontario

December Contest Winner:

More December Bloopers:

I was in my last year of law school and my sports and entertainment law club was visiting a very prestigious Bay street law firm. We were taken to a beautiful conference room with expensive art hanging on the walls, giant leather chairs and mahogany furniture. The caterer brought in a delicious lunch with custard fruit tortes for desert. We were all sitting around the conference table having lunch when I got a craving for one of those custard tortes. I waited until other people helped themselves before getting one for myself. Everyone was looking at the senior partner and the head recruiter to see how they would eat them. When we all saw that they were eating them with their hands we felt comfortable to do the same. Just as I proceeded to take a bite out of the delicious treat, it fell apart in my hands, spilling all over my suit, the leather chair, mahogany conference table and Persian rug. Needless to say I made a lasting first impression! Everyone had a good laugh. Maria Rossin

More Bloopers:

As a veteran of the business world and very comfortable in all situations, the boss (CEO of the company) invited me to a fun lunch with 2 other colleagues of mine. I was wearing my brand new silk red dress. (Red silk may sound a bit over dressed for the office but it was holiday time and the dress has a conservative and tailored cut). We went to a Chinese restaurant and as I began savoring my delicious meal, a whole broccoli flower fell onto my lap, slathering the dress in Hunan sauce. It was around the time of Monica you-know-who, so I laughed off the experience and made a good joke by referencing Monica and the stained dress but I had to walk around the entire afternoon with the huge stain saying "Hello" to everyone. Luckily for me, everyone appreciated the Monica joke so I was able to give everyone a good laugh at the expense of my mishap. The good news is... I took the dress to the cleaners, explained what had soiled it and they cleaned it like new... whew! Linda Nussbaum, Calgary, AB

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